The Gow Siblings: Robert William Gow

Robert William Gow was born on September 14, 1857 in Cairn Farm, Muthill, Perthshire, Scotland. He was the second eldest child of William Gow and Jean Drummond. He lived on his family's farm until the late 1870's. According to the 1881 Scotland Census, he was working as a gardener. Robert left Scotland and arrived in Sydney on May 23, 1884 via the ship Potosi. He was the first person in his family to leave Scotland.

Robert Gow, 1879, Scotland.
[Source: Personal Collection]

On August 4, 1886, Robert married Mary Agnes Ryan in Sydney. Robert was Presbyterian, however Mary was Catholic. Apparently it was looked down upon if Catholics married Presbyterians. Robert and Mary married in the Catholic Church. There might have been an increased risk of Mary being ostracized from her family if she did not marry in the Catholic Church. I wonder if this risk wasn't relevant for Robert?

Robert and Mary lived in Willoughby, Sydney where they had eight children together -

1. Myrtle, born 1887, Sydney
2. Allen Drummond, born 1889, Sydney
3. Mary, born 1891, Sydney
4. Nellie, born 1893, Sydney
5. William Drummond, born 1895, Sydney
6. Ronald Drummond, born 1897, Sydney
7. Millicent, born 1900, Sydney
8. Eric Drummond, born 1902, Sydney

All four boys were given the middle name Drummond - Robert's mother's maiden name.

Robert passed away on December 8, 1927, four years after Mary died. Robert and Mary are both buried in Macquarie Cemetery in Sydney. They are not buried together because of their different religions - Robert is buried in the Presbyterian section and Mary in the Catholic section. When they got married, I wonder if they knew they weren't going to be buried together? Robert is buried with their eldest daughter Myrtle.

Grave of Robert William Gow & his daughter Myrtle
Macquarie Cemetery, Sydney.
[Source: Personal Collection]

Which Church did they marry in?

It turns out that my Great Great Uncle Robert Gow & his wife Mary Ryan married in the Catholic Church…

Marriage Certificate of Robert W. Gow & Mary A. Ryan
Purchased from the New South Wales BDM Registry

I suppose there was an increased risk for Mary being ostracized from her family if she did not marry in the Catholic Church. A risk that was greater than if Robert didn’t marry in a Presbyterian church I suppose. Hmm. Now I’d like to find out when Mary came to Australia & if her parents came with her too as I have’t been able to discover that as of yet…

Why aren't you buried together?

While in Sydney on holidays a few weeks ago, I found the graves of my Great Great Uncle Robert William Gow, & his wife Mary Agnes Ryan. Robert was born in Scotland, and I believe Mary was from Ireland (I’m still yet to prove this though). They married in Sydney in 1886. They are both buried in Macquarie Cemetery in Sydney. I found Mary’s grave first, pictured below.

Grave of Mary Agnes Gow, Macquarie Cemetery, Sydney. June 2013.
Personal collection.

She died in 1923, in Sydney and is buried in the Catholic Section. It looks like there is plenty of room on the headstone for another inscription. I would have assumed for her husband. I began to wonder why Robert was not buried with her.

My Aunty & I then found Robert’s grave in the Presbyterian Section, buried with his & Mary’s eldest child Myrtle Gow.

Grave of Robert W. Gow & Myrtle Gow.
Macquarie Cemetery, Sydney, June 2013.
Personal collection.

Upon finding Robert’s grave, my Aunt realized why Robert & Mary are not buried together - their different religions. He was Presbyterian, she was Catholic. We hadn’t at all thought that religion would play a part in this. According to my Aunt, during the time that Robert & Mary were alive, different religions weren’t allowed to be buried together.

I don’t know much about the history of religion, but apparently it was looked down on if a Catholic & Presbyterian married. It would have made for an interesting marriage I would think. I’m very curious to find out which church they married in & by whom. Time to order their marriage certificate! I’m hoping this will also provide me with information about Mary’s possible Irish background & her parents.

I wonder if Robert & Mary knew that when they passed away they were not going to be buried together…hmm…